Here's her ad: The full text reads: The dating world has changed a lot since I got divorced. I love stand-up comedy, film, TV, theater, music, cruises, coffee, museums. Please don't respond if you are alcoholic or smoke pot/use any drugs, or are married/involved with someone else, or are under 45. "It used to be a thing no one understood or wanted to talk about," she recalls.
"Like something was wrong with you if you had to take that path to get a date." But along with the advent of online dating, and the dozens and dozens of sites created to make finding companionship easy, she figured out the cold, hard, truth: any site can promise to make you a match, but paying .99 a month to find love doesn’t necessarily mean love will find you.
So why, Ellen, would you take your quest to the land of apartment scams and Ikea dressers?
Surprisingly, she says, people are more honest there. Ellen has dabbled in online dating for almost two decades. And for a few years, I had profiles on Match and J-Date up at the same time.” Ellen's voice is warm and inviting. But as anyone who has spent more than five minutes in the dating scene knows, finding a true partner can be like searching for Waldo (as in “Where’s? And Waldo, Ellen says, was not on any of the dating sites she signed up for.
Not included under this umbrella are personal ads, so you’ll need to head somewhere else to find your Missed Connection or potential love interest.“I started online dating shortly after I got divorced in 1998,” Ellen, a psychiatrist, told me when I contacted her — through Craigslist, of course — to inquire about her ad. A stand-up comedian by night, she has a great sense of humor. “I learned to ask a lot of questions,” she told me when I asked what she had learned from her experiences.“I tried it all — JDate, Match, e Harmony…” Her voice trails off, as if she’s thinking hard. And, like the rest of the millions of people registered on dating sites and apps across the internet, she finds dating exciting, if not simultaneously exhausting. “When I go on dates now I say, you know, ‘are you completely, verifiably divorced,’ you know, ‘are you completely single?Those adventures have spanned 10 counties and four states and involved roughly 45,000 e-mailed words, 27 phone calls, 36 face-to-face initial dates and 13 actual lovers -- and re-aggravated our carpal tunnel syndrome from all the typing.Years before embarking on Craigslist, both of us had experienced sexual abandonment.